Showing posts with label poisson d'Avril. Show all posts
Showing posts with label poisson d'Avril. Show all posts

Thursday, April 1, 2010

This Just In....


The French Government today, announced several far-reaching changes that it says will go into effect within the next several years. This announcement has caused a huge stir here in France resulting in retaliation plans by several trade unions and government worker groups.


In an effort to conserve paper, the government will require all it’s offices and subsidiaries to reduce required paperwork by half. Ecologists have taken to the streets in celebration but paper companies have threatened to shut down all importation until the law is repealed and The Copy Machine Conglomerate is quickly organizing a group to begin talks with the Sarkozy administration.

As an addendum to this new change, the government says it has assembled a think tank group to devise a way for simple and necessary information to be accessed by computer at all related government agencies. The group is also being charged with the daunting task of devising an efficient telephone answering system in all government offices in order to “prevent the current practice of taking the phone off the hook”.

“Our government is paying millions of euros per year to store the mounds of paper we have accumulated”, said one government official. “And we have yet to find a way to locate any particular document when it becomes necessary”.

In addition, a new program is being established that requires all government workers to attend 2.5 hours of continuing education per year in order to learn the art of pleasantry and smiling. This program will replace the current CE program entitled “500 Alternative Ways to Actually Say “Here is your copy. Do not lose this because we will lose all of ours.” Government workers have put their foot down and plan a strike for the entire month of September. An unnamed spokesperson said today, “this should extend our already extensive August holiday by 4 weeks and with all that is now being expected of us, we deserve it.”