Showing posts with label questions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label questions. Show all posts

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Desperately Seeking Solutions


Dear Sir or Madam,

I am an expatriate American living in the south of France. I have been meaning to write to you for the past 2 years but this morning I used up my last roll of Glad Press-n-Seal and this loss has moved me forward.

It is astounding to me that a country like France continues to struggle with unusable, antiquated plastic wrap. I am continually watching people fight, contort, cajole, and often finally give up when trying to cover their leftovers .  Their defeat often leaves refrigerators smelling like cheese. The cheese here is divine…..it tastes like a dream but it smells like a nightmare! What is so amazing to me is that a superior product has been invented. Why do the French people continue to suffer?

Those of us Americans who live here always make sure to return with several roles of this magic. I have given it as gifts to my French friends and have found that demonstrating its efficacy is a great party game!

I may sound light-hearted but, in fact, I’m dead serious. I propose that you begin marketing your Press-n-Seal products here in France. This is your opportunity to open a new market as well as save a nation.

Of course, I would like to be the person to help you. With my background in marketing and my passable French, together we could bring this country out of the depths of despair. A mercy mission with monetary rewards. A “Keep It Fresh” D-Day if you will.

I look forward to hearing your response. We are suffering.

Deepest Respect,

Photobucket

Yes, I really did send this. Perhaps I have too much time on my hands!

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

More Earth Shattering, Mind Blowing, World Changing Questions About France

1. Why are there so many male hairdressers and why do they all look like they just got out of bed? And often like they could really use a meal...or vitamins?


2. Why is there a word for husband but no real word for wife. Husband is "mari" but wife is "femme" which also means woman. I wouldn't like being called someone's woman.

3. Also, why is there no word for "date"? As in "I have a date with Maurice" or "I dated him for several months until he called me his woman"?

4. Do the French people understand how heavenly their mustard is? Even their bad mustard?

5. Why do French children always seem to have such adorable shoes?


6.  Why are French people so willing to stand in lines? If I had to wait in a grocery store line at home like the ones I stand in here, people would be expressing their discontent with gestures and loud sighs as the young-manager-of-the-store-who-can't-even-grow-a-beard-yet scurries around trying find a stockboy who can run a register and when he can't he will eventually open and work the register himself.

7. Why do French people say oui, oui, oui (3 plus) to say yes? I do the same in French but I rarely, if ever, respond to a question with yes, yes, yes.

8. Why is there a prevalence of woman over 40 with a really weird red hair color?

As usual, I await your responses! And more questions.

Photobucket

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Earth Shattering, Mind Blowing, World Changing Questions About France


I've decided to periodically ask meaningful questions about my new country of residence. I'm hoping somebody can give me answers....reasonable or not!


1. How can an entire country eat soup without soda crackers?


2.What's with all the pink toilet paper?


3. How do french people make their lips do "that thing" when they talk?


4. What's with all the black clothes?


5.Who eats all that great looking stuff at the patisserrie?


6. How can a country with so many religous holidays, have so few people that go to church?


7. In the same vein, are the constantly clanging church bells a desperate attempt to change this situation?


8. Why is there not an actually word in the French language for 'hug'?



Photobucket